Monday, November 21, 2011

Birth Story

**FYI I started this and wrote most of it a few hours after she was born.  Hopefully that helps make more sense as you read on.  It just needed some editing I haven't gotten around to til now**

I know it seems crazy that I'm writing this already.  Most people seem to take a month before posting the birth story on their blog - but here's the thing.  I am a firm believer that if you don't write something down soon after it happened, then the details become a little fuzzy and it's hard to completely capture all that you were feeling.  So due to the fact that I'm miraculously not that tired {yet} and I have most likely 48 hours til we leave the hospital, I have decided to shock you all and tell you how it all went down.

{If you missed the "Pre" Birth Story, aka what I wrote this morning, you can find it here}
I believe we left off at about 5:00am and I was kind of frustrated with life... yeeah...

Well I managed to make it to 6:00. Everything changed after that.  (Did I mention I was on pitocin all night? Ok well I was.  They didn't want her in there for too long after I started leaking the amniotic fluid). The doctor came in and decided to really break my water.  It had a tear in it last night and that's why I kept having the small gushes of fluid.  He broke it and all of a sudden I could feel the contractions! I was no longer just an uncomfortable pregnant lady - I knew I was in labor.  Jeremy's hand got a lot of squeezing over the next thirty minutes.  At that point I decided, "I'm going to end up getting an epidural.  I pretty much already know that. So why wait?" The nurse said that considering how fast and how hard my contractions were coming an epidural really wouldn't slow things down much.  She checked me and I had already progressed to 6 cm and still 90%. 

So the nurse got me all set up for when the anesthesiologist came in that way it'd go faster and I'd be relieved that much sooner {btw its not that easy to maneuver all over a bed when you're 9 months pregnant and there are tubes and wires and gauges and monitors all over/in your body}.  Finally I got to where she wanted me.  Next thing I know she's telling me the anesthesiologist who likes to put in epidurals that way is just getting off his shift and this other doctor is going to do it.  But he likes it when you are positioned this way. Peachy... Get all situated for the next doctor - oops! 'I can't put in epidurals left handed!' Switch to the other side of the bed. gah...  Really it wasn't that bad.  
The nurse was super nice and she'd been working for the past 12+ hours so it worked.
We finally got to where we needed me to be.  

Once the epidural kicked in it was wonderful! I could just watch the little monitor telling me I was in immense pain and not even bat an eye.  We did have a little scare when baby's heart beat dropped really fast and the nurse couldn't get the belly monitor to pick up a stronger beat.  So in went a new monitor right on her head.  Her heart beat was flawless and Jeremy and I finally sat back and relaxed. 

Less than an hour later, however, I started feeling the contractions again.  I was pretty sure my state of bliss had started out better than this.  So in came the anesthesiologist again and after lots of experimenting he figured it out.  Something was wrong with an air bubble in the tube? I don't know.  At the time I was thinking "breathe, breathe, breathe, breathe."  Finally he got it up and running again.  The nurse checked me once more and I was 10 cm and 100% effaced!
 Wah bammm! {This was about 8:30 by the way}

The nurse was impressed and started getting everything set up.  The doctor was going to be a while, but she figured since this was my first she could let me practice pushing a little cause 'nothing was going to happen'.  On push number three I was crowning {I would like to say that push number one shouldn't really count because I didn't know what to do yet! I guess it counts though haha}.  As soon as she saw baby's head she yelled "WOAH! STOP!" Apparently I'm just too good at this baby making/having thing lol.  This was probably about 9:10am.  The nurse didn't want to deliver the baby alone, so we waited patiently for the doctor to get there.  I think that was my favorite moment from the entire day.  Sounds kind of ridiculous, but she she told me I was doing so well, especially for my first time and that Madeline would be out in no time, I couldn't control myself.  The hormones took over and I realized how good and right everything felt.  I was so proud of my body and all the wonderful things it could accomplish - labor and delivery kind of being the climax of that.  I knew that very soon I'd be holding my sweet little girl in my arms and everything would be ok. 

Mean while I'm still having a lot of serious contractions.  Not painful, but strong pressure - I could feel that.  She was already descended partially down the birth canal and with all the pressure I was feeling I was slightly afraid that with or without my help, if the doctor didn't get there soon, she'd make her appearance doctor-less.  

Luckily Dr. Melendez made it in time.  My biggest fear about delivery was having to have an episiotomy.  But considering the tearing alternative I'd come to the conclusion that if it had to be one of them, I'd trust the doctor to snip-snip-snip.  The doctor quickly evaluated that I would need an episiotomy.  And I said, "Alright. Whatever it takes. Lets just get this baby here!" I listened to a few sickening snips and he was done.  It didn't hurt - physically - but I really didn't like listening haha.  One solid push and her head was out.  Jeremy told me she had lots of dark hair and I could hardly believe it! Another push and she was out.  That was it! Jeremy cut the cord, and Madeline was whisked to the corner of the room to be weighed and cleaned off a bit.  I think I would have preferred to just have her tossed on my chest, but I was so in awe of everything that had just happened that just watching her from a distance was satisfying.  My uterus pushed on my placenta on it's own and that was it.
Labor/Delivery Accomplished.

The next few minutes were kind of a haze of disbelief.  A million things were flying through my mind: "Had I really just had a baby? Oh my goodness I'm not pregnant anymore! And it feels GOOD! Is that really my baby over there? She's so beautiful.  Look at those eyes. She has the most beautiful cry. Where's Jeremy is he ok? Wow this doctor isn't skipping a beat getting my stitches put in. Is Jeremy taking pictures? I can't believe this is happening!" {And lots of other things I can't remember now...}

Before I knew it Madeline was in my arms.
{I'm sorry the picture is such bad quality -- I sort of deleted the ones on our camera and this was just on Jeremy's phone. No we don't have smart phones.  We're poor people}

It's hard to explain how many ways my life has changed in the past week, but it's been the best week of my life. {Yes better than our honeymoon - and I know Jeremy would agree} But not better than our wedding day. {Sorry Madeline but Daddy takes that cake :) You'll understand someday}.  I've never felt this kind of love for anyone.  I spend most of my nights awake nursing her and somehow it's not that much of a chore because I'm just so in love with this little face!

There are so many things I want to write down to remember and share with you but I can't remember all of the wonderful things that happen and she does.  I will say that one of our favorite things is watching her smile as she sleeps.  Somehow she manages to smile at the perfect time that coincides with one of our conversations.  OH and the other night she was laying on me and filled her diaper in a hurry.  She was asleep and the noise/feelings scared her so much she jumped. It was HILARIOUS! hahaha! She's grown and changed so much in just one short week and I can't decide if I want to watch her grow up or just hold her as this beautiful tiny little baby forever.  Luckily I don't get to choose - she'll grow up. But I'm sad that it's already going by so fast. 

And now our Little Miss Madeline and I are heading to bed.  We love our snuggle time :)


  1. oh sarah, she is absolutely adorable!!!

  2. Aww!! Sarah, this is a beautiful story. Thanks for sharing! I can't wait to see you and Madeline :)

  3. Aww how perfect! I'm so jealous you don't even know!! There is nothing I want more than a birth story that didn't end in a year of PTSD!

    Part of the counseling/treatment process for that, by the way, is planning #2 out...timeline, vbac/another c-section, etc. Just so I know I can have another baby one day. I want to thank you for your explanation and calm telling of your episiotomy! That sounds like a weird compliment out of context, but it really hit me as I read that that it's not as big a deal as I was making an episiotomy out to be in my head! I just want everything to go perfectly next time, but even if a minor adjustment like that happens, it's not the end of the world, or cause for more trauma :o)

    You are awesome!! Congratulations! I can't wait to see all the awesome pictures you take of miss Madeline!

  4. So good to read how it all happened. I wanted the scoop so badly when I saw you on Saturday. She's beautiful and you and Jeremy make a wonderful Mom and Dad. She's one lucky little girl. So happy we could see you all!!


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