I was overwhelmed by all the love and support
I received Monday after this post.
I must admit that I wasn’t posting it to get anyone’s attention or have
a bunch of people boost my self-esteem. I was simply trying to write it all out
and get my feelings off my chest and into the open. {I even considered turning comments off
for a couple days, but I often times mess everything up when I try to change
things on the blog – so I passed on that}
But thank you thank you to all of you who commented, called, texted,
facebooked, emailed, or simply said something in passing. It meant a lot. You made me feel like I have a purpose. And I’m very excited by how natural it
felt to lay it all out on the table.
{This book people – I’m telling ya! Okay, I should probably finish the book before I recommend
it, but I’m loving it so far}.
For a long time I’ve wanted to have a widely
popular blog that was fun and quirky and fashionable and just posted fun happy
things all the time. But the other day I realized I don’t have to make my life
seem perfect on the blog. Now
before you exit out and stop following me, let me say that I have no intention
of making this my venting place. I don’t want to only post about my hard days
and make everybody else’s life doomy-gloomy. I hope to simply speak the truth. Including the hard days and the wonderful days, and
hopefully it’ll mostly be happy.
Alrighty, enough un-structured rambling thoughts and on to the slightly
structured stuff.
The funny thing about self-worth is you can’t
get it from anybody else. You have
to learn and decide for yourself that you are beautiful and that your life and
purpose is beautiful. I hate to think
of the way Jeremy has yearned to be able to help me. {he does help me A LOT! But I felt like I had gotten to the point where I really needed to stand on my own two feet and figure it out on my own. Just me and the Lord}. He tells me I’m beautiful. That he loves me.
He cares for me. And I know
he does. But if I don’t believe
those things then it is sometimes hard to hear. I’m sure I’m not alone on this one. Scenario: Your husband gets home from
work/school, you haven’t showered and if you have make-up on it’s minimal. Your
hair is either rocking a pony tail or just straight up crazy. The baby is crying, dishes haven’t been
done, toys everywhere and your t-shirt and baggy jeans are anything but sexy. So this handsome, clean, hunk of
wonderful husband of yours encircles you in his arms and says, “[insert your
name here] Sarah, you are beautiful.”
And you just about fall apart because you feel anything but beautiful.
Not to mention, the other day when you did shower and applied some
mascara, maybe fixed your hair and put your nicest outfit on, subconsciously {or consciously}, hoping for a compliment and a, “Who is this woman and what
happened to my wife?!” {not really but ya know}, not a word was mentioned
about the extra effort put into personal hygiene and appearance. Why do we let that bug us? Why can’t we be happy and accept that
our husbands, these wonderful men who bought a diamond and asked us to spend
eternity with them, really do think we’re beautiful? Baggy jeans and all. Maybe
I’m the only one out there that feels this way. But I am doing better.
And it feels good.
So apparently I’ve turned into a longer-post
writer… hope that’s ok. If it’s
not, you probably took off a while ago and are no longer reading. I had some other thoughts to share but
I think I’ll just save them for another day. Just to lighten the mood I thought you’d all enjoy this
SNL clip.
Happy Wednesday everybody! We’re going to be enjoying a
beautiful sixty-degree sun-shiney day!
again.. still not married lol but I feel like your posts apply to everyone. I had the hardest time accepting compliments in High School, but then I realized how rude it made me look thinking people were just making things up. I realized I feel better when I accept it and i'm much happier...and those compliments usually come when I roll out of bed, throw on some yoga pants and put my hair in a messy bun..weird how that works. None-the-less you have a great husband! Glad Jeremy treats you so well :)
ReplyDeleteYou're so so sweet Sarah! I just love reading these posts--I feel for ya!
ReplyDelete